By Katya Klauz, Jewish Family Services

Someone very insightful once wrote “A transition period is a period between two transition periods.” I recently found myself transitioning into a life of the “sandwich generation” at almost 50 years old. I became a grandmother and a part-time mother to my elderly 89-year-old dad, all at once. I was imagining and expecting it, but nevertheless, the idea became a reality quite suddenly. 

I settled into a “grandma” role pretty quickly and painlessly, but the part-time-mom-to-my-dad gig was threatening to become a full-time with every new week. Since my mom’s passing a few years ago, my dad was adamant about living on his own in their apartment. His overall physical health was and still is ok, but the age-related dementia started to progress pretty rapidly. At first, I was not sure how to handle his sudden mood changes, suspiciousness, insomnia, forgetfulness and inability to carry out some very basic everyday tasks. So, after several hectic and nerve-wracking months, my husband and I decided to find a tech-based solution to any of my dad’s problems that can be solved with technology and thus, could be resolved remotely.

First, we installed a Wyze camera system: one in his kitchen, one in the living room pointing at his TV and the last one pointing at his entrance door. He was happy to have a camera, because he now could “catch” anyone entering the apartment whenever he was outside walking. This camera is very easy to setup and with the app installed on my iPhone, I can quickly check what’s going on in real time and up to 12 hours prior. Now, I could easily guide him on the phone through the meals in the kitchen and see if he needed any other immediate attention.

Next step was to organize and monitor his medication. We tried many daily pill-containers, until we found a “Hero.”  This automatic pill-dispenser machine was a lifesaver! It has the capacity to hold up to 10 different medications that you can refill whenever needed. It also has an iPhone app where I keep track of the doses (taken or missed), I can change the schedule, check if the medication quantity is low and set reminders – all remotely.  The Hero is not cheap at $30/month, but my dad’s adherence to taking his medication became a consistent 95-100%. I think it’s totally worth it. 

Another biggie was TV. My father only speaks Russian, and lives alone, so Russian TV is his only window into a bigger world. For many years, my mom and dad watched Russian-based channels on a Russian satellite dish, which constantly had issues with the signal, hardware, etc,. We made the executive decision to move to an Internet-based TV provider and installed a Fire TV platform. This inevitably created two new issues for my dad: unfamiliar interface on the screen and a new remote. His attempts to control this new system failed miserably. To make the long story short, we got rid of the remote that came with Fire TV Stick and bought an EasyMote – a Universal Big Button TV Remote. Now, the only two operations my dad needed to use was the ON/OFF button and volume. Channel buttons were disabled by my tech-savvy husband (you can also just tape over those functions on the remote itself). The real control of this TV was now in my hands – remotely! We installed an iPhone app called BroadLink, which gives the remote access to various home devices. After installing this app, we added his TV to it and Voila! I now could switch his TV on and off anytime he needed. The Russian TV provider also has an app, which (with a little bit of practice) can be controlled via iPhone as well.

The set up was also complete with a few taped notes by the heater/air conditioner, on the phone charger and on the wall white board. I’m sure this whole system will change as we progress into the unknown, but my ”almost full-time mommy mode” gradually reduced to a manageable few weekly visits to help him shower, groom, listen to his endless stories, and bring a set of individually packaged home-cooked meals in one hand and clean laundry in the other.

Links and Pricing:

Wyze camera $29.99 per each camera, no monthly fees,  and free phone app 

Hero Pill Dispenser $30/monthly rent and free phone app    

Amazon Fire TV Stick $39.99, no monthly fees, and free phone app

EasyMote remote  $15.95

BroadLink app $25.99, no monthly fees, and free phone app